Why are so many parents my age treating their children like their best friend?
These adults-these parents-keep living their lives almost the same way they did as before they had children. Want to go the movies at 8 p.m.? Sure! I will just bring my 3 year old with me! Why?!
I will never understand. It just boggles my mind. By 8 p.m., two of my children are in bed and the teenager has an hour to do her own thing. If I am going to meet friends for dinner and cocktails at 7 p.m., my children are not coming with. And if my friends plan to bring their children, I just stay home.
Yes, I plan my life around my daughters schedule, not the other way around. They each have a bedtime. Dinner is between 5-6pm each night depending on their activities. They have schedules and routines. I do not have problems trying to adjust them to a school schedule, or get calls from teachers because they are sleeping in class. One friends vents to me on a regular basis about how hard it is to get her children out of bed each morning for school. I listen while I bite my tongue. I want to tell her to have her children in bed at a decent time each night, but I keep this thought to myself. She takes them with her everywhere. If they are home be 8 p.m. on a school night, it is an early night. Then it is time for dinner and homework. Her children stay up later than I do most evenings.
I gave up my social life for the most part when I started having children. And with each child I have had, I gave up more and more. There is a single parent that is always upset because she does not have the same social life now that she used to. I feel for her, but I have no pity. Spending every weekend at home with your children is the price parents pay for having children. Not everyone is able to afford babysitters on a regular basis.
They are my daughters-NOT my best friends. I will be their mom first. I will set rules and guidelines. I will have expectations. They do not need to be a clubs with me or sit in a booth while I drink with my friends. My goal is to give them a sense of stability and something that resembles a moral compass. I have no desire to be the party mom. This is just my personal choice.
About a month ago, I was invited out by a friend. She wanted to have dinner and drinks. As another single mom, she was planning on bringing both of her children. Granted, they are both school age and have tablets to play on, but no thank you. Personally, I have no interest in sharing a picture of margaritas with someone, then driving home. How do children fit into that situation? Sober cab for you and the kiddos?