I need to get a paycheck rolling in as fast as possible! We are so far behind on the electric bill, they now have us on a limiter.

In Minnesota, they cannot turn off the electric 100% during the winter unless a client meets certain criteria. Instead, they put on a limiter. This means there is enough electricity to run to furnace and fridge, one or two lights and that is about it. Just trying to take a bath trips the power and everything shuts down for 20 minutes because the water heater uses to much electric. We have been like this since Monday.

No laundry can be done. The dryer trips the limiter. Washing dishes means boiling water on the stove-water heater again. And the furnace has to be turned down low because the more it has to work, the more often it trips the power. We have negative temps, wind chills and ice. We can only have the heat up as high as 65 degrees. This may sound comfy, but in reality, it is still cold in here; especially at night.

I hate being broke:( I hate being poor:(

I feel like a failure as a parent. How is this being a good parent? How is this taking care of my children? This sucks!! At night, I sit in the dark and turn the furnace up as much as I dare so the girls are warm in bed. I think to myself that this is all my fault because I cannot find a decent job. So far, I have zero money coming in. My only saving grace is the fact that a fast food place has hired me and I start next week. That still means at least two weeks before my first check and it will be a small one. None of this helps me immediately with my electric bill.

My daughters need clean clothes, they need hot water for bathing and personal hygiene. This is absolutely ridiculous! How much more can I possibly fail them?! D- is upset and nervous. She is used to having her electronics and now that is not an option. She is used to long, hot showers each night to help her calm down before bed.

A- is waiting for her favorite blanket to be washed. She has been waiting all week. She is emotional and complaining everyday because I cannot use the machines. I know they blame me for this. A- told me last night it is because I am lazy and do nothing. It took everything I had to stop myself from crying in front of her. My 7-year old has an extremely low opinion of me. This is a terrible example to set for them. You can imagine what this is doing to my depression:(

I have tried to set up a payment plan, but that has gotten me no where. I made a payment two days before they shut me off and when I called, they said it was not good enough. They want payment in full. If I had that kind of money, I would take care of it!

To bad food stamps cannot be used to pay the utilities:(